Top 3 Clueless Comments Freelance Writers Get — and How to Respond

Editor

Casual businesswoman resting head on desk in the officeWorking as a freelance writer makes life equal parts challenging and exciting.

You may keep strange hours. You may have to navigate periods of too much work — and the dry spells that sometimes follow.

The one thing you need most is the support of those around you. But sometimes they just don’t get it.

Here are the comments I’ve heard from people who don’t understand freelancing — and the responses I’ve used to help them get it.

 

1. “If you had a real job, you’d understand.”

For people who equate the word “job” with working 9-5, the world of freelance writers is baffling.

You see the late nights, early mornings, and weekend work. They picture you napping during the day and binge-watching Netflix.

Comments like these are hurtful, no doubt. But they’re often said because of a true lack of understanding (or even a little tinge of jealousy), and not out of spite. Knowing this can help to lessen the sting.

Instead of throwing a jab back, try educating the person about what life is really like for freelance writers. When they toss an, “If you had a real job” your way, you can say,

“Actually, I’ve got deadlines to meet and clients counting on me just like you do. Every morning I get up at 7:30, answer e-mails from clients, spend some time brainstorming story ideas, put together pitches for magazines, and scout out potential new clients.

“I break around noon for lunch, probably like you do when you’re at work, then I get back to it and spend time writing and revising copy, meeting with clients in person or on the phone, and sending invoices. It’s a real job — I’m just doing it in my home.”

2. “What do you do all day?”

This may come from a friend who has the day off and wants you to join them somewhere. Or it could be an honest question from a family member who just isn’t thinking about the implications of their words.

Instead of laughing off the remark or rolling your eyes, try saying something like this:

“I usually start my day by answering e-mails from clients. Then I spend the rest of the morning working on new projects, whether it’s writing an article for a magazine or handling copy for a client’s brochure.

“In the afternoon, I’ll work on pitching new clients or invoicing so I can keep the work coming in when I’ve wrapped up my current projects. Sometimes, I’ll have a meeting with a potential new client or a call with an existing one. I typically work until 5:30 or so, and may do some more work in the evening depending on deadlines.”

It’s easy for someone to understand what a doctor or a teacher does when they head into work, but they may need more details to fully appreciate the workflow of a freelance writer. By hearing exactly what a day looks like for you, they’ll understand it’s not just about lounging around in your sweats.

3. “Could you watch kids/do an errand for me?”

You know the quality of your work suffers when you divert attention away from writing projects to child care or household chores, but this may not be apparent to others.

Explain to your family that your workday is like anyone else’s, even if it happens at home:

“It wouldn’t be a good idea if I showed up to your school or workplace with a load of laundry that needs folding, right? These chores wait until you come home, so you can concentrate during the day.

“I’d appreciate it if it could be the same for me. My work suffers when I’m trying to multitask, and I want to make sure I keep my clients happy by giving them 100 percent of my attention.”

Whatever you do, keep your cool — and remember, the only one who really has to understand the freelance lifestyle is you. If friends and family don’t get it, find a writer community where you can share your concerns.

How do you respond to misconceptions about freelancing? Tell us in the comments below.

Lauren Levine is a freelance copywriter, magazine writer, and blogger who lives in Charlotte, North Carolina. Check out her blog, Life with Lauren.

55 Comments

  1. Aziz

    Hello, I’m an electronic engineer passed out recently. I have applied for few jobs but seriously I don’t want to work under anyone. My problem is I live in India where all the perky neighbours and relatives look as 23-year-old boy doing at home when all others are working. well, I too want to have a job and support my family just for ‘parental’ pressure.
    Do you think freelancing is substitute for job? They don’t cover other aspects of job like covers and promotions.
    I told my mother and she says, “You don’t want to succeed in life. For how long you can depend on this crap.”
    I was hurt. Is freelance writing good for supporting a family? Can we grow by freelancing only? as we don’t get any experience letter or whatever. Please help me.

    • Carol Tice

      Aziz, it’s a generational issue rather than a country issue. Many of our parents spent their working lives in a world where job security existed, and was important to secure. I hear this plenty from U.S. writers, too. But today, job security is increasingly elusive, and building your own business more viable, thanks to the Internet and the ability to earn remotely.

      It’s certainly possible to earn a full-time living as a freelance writer — but to do it, you’ll have to have the confidence to pursue it even if people around you don’t understand that this has more potential to create financial security than the traditional route.

  2. Mandi Bowerman

    Wow, this post really hit home. I’ve heard these comments before and they do sting. But as you point out, you learn to handle them. My income is slowing growing, and there have been times I’ve wanted to give up because of these comments, but I’ve stayed with it. Thanks for posting this.

    • Elke

      Oh yes. For years I used to get comments that I don’t work ’cause I’m at home – and people turning up to get me put of the house as assumed I must be bored, in need of company.

      I also live in a rural area where the concept of working is very much linked to working on a farm, and sweating – and nothing else counts.

      A few years ago, I worked in an office for a while, and was shocked to discover that working 9-5 was so easy in comparison.

      Like others have already pointed out, you can chat – sometimes as much as you like – and no one seems to mind. And you automatically get lunch breaks which you must take for legal reasons.

      Best of all, when you get home, you’re finished! In the evenings I was completely free to engage in some unpaid speculative writing (short works of fiction).

      I’m now back working full-time at home, mostly writing non-fiction articles. I adore how I don’t have to commute, can get household chores done and prepare meals while thinking about a story concept, research angles without interruptions from others – unlike working in an office.

      I even have a easel set up and paint for a total break if I get stuck on an article.

    • Carol Tice

      I do sometimes long for the days when people had a 2-day weekend. Nobody went into the office or logged in. They just relaxed! Of course, as freelancers we are free to set our own schedules. But I find the Internet age really challenges us to be offline and turn our full attention to our personal life. The ferry I ride used to not have Internet, for instance…but now it does. Really a mixed blessing.

Related Posts

You CAN Write a Query Letter That Gets a “Yes”: 5 Resources

Freelance writer getting a gig after learning to write a query letter.

Love them or hate them, queries are one of the most important marketing tools for any freelancer who wants to write for magazines. And the skills you learn from writing a good query letter also help business writers and copywriters pitch their potential clients.

If you’ve been sending queries off into space and never getting a reply, you may think it’s impossible to break into new magazines. But it’s not true! Editors are always looking for new talent.

To help you learn to write a query letter that will get you the gig, we’ve pulled together a collection of five of our best posts on pitching:

Can’t Write? Try These 9 Ideas for Writing Motivation

It’s the bane of every freelance writer’s life: You know you need to sit yourself down and get some writing done, but nothing happens. The writing motivation just isn’t there. Sometimes, you can't even make yourself sit down with the computer -- even if you...